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Unforgettable First Impressions Part 4: Become a Social Gift Giver
Do you ever wonder why single people give flowers, wine, candy or mix CD's on first dates? Bingo! Because they want to get lucky! Just kidding. They bring gifts because they want make a great first impression. And that's the sixth and last element of this system: giving gifts. But I'm not talking about gifts you eat, drink, listen to or have to water. I'm talking about social gifts. I purposely placed this element last in the system because it helps you put into practice many of the ideas we've already covered. In all of my reading and research on first impressions, the best description of "social gifts" was written in a book called First Impressions by Dr. Ann Demaris and Dr. Valerie White. I'd like to look at their theory of the four types of social gifts, but take it a step further with some specific examples you can use tomorrow to make flawless first impressions. Social Gift #1: Show Appreciation and Respect "Thanks for your honesty; it means a lot to me." "Thanks for the interesting conversation, Randy. I really learned a lot." "Thanks for bringing me that bottle of water. I thought I was going to choke on that piece of broccoli." Social Gift #2: Discover How You're Alike "Where did you go to high school?" I don't know why we're obsessed with this question. But the answer always discovers the CPI (Common Point of Interest) - whether it's a person you both know, an old football game or just a memorable teen moment. It's amazing how easy it is to give a social gift to someone simply by asking this question (And if you're reading this book and you grew up in St. Louis, my answer to "The Question" is Parkway North). But that's a St. Louis thing. Still, the list of open ended questions you can use to find out how you and your conversation partner are alike is endless! Social Gift #3: Satisfy Curiosity You may be wondering if, after more than four years, this question ever gets old. Not at all. I've always enjoyed answering this question not only because it allows me to talk about my passion, my business and the validation for my existence, but also because it empowers me to give a social gift as a result of being approachable. After all, seeing a nametag worn by a person who's NOT in a meeting or at work is awfully strange. And people just have to ask. People just have to satisfy their curiosity! But there are many other ways to give social gifts for the sake of someone else's curiosity. My favorite is through trivia. You know those useless trivia facts found on daily calendars, candy wrappers and emails? They're not so useless after all. In the summer of 2004 I read a sidebar in USA Today that said the following: "Every year on the Fourth of July, Americans consume 150 million hotdogs. If you lined up that amount of hotdogs from end to end, they would stretch from the moon AND BACK seven times." When I read this I was amazed. Maybe I was nauseous - I don't recall. Either way, I learned a piece of trivia that was both relevant AND interesting. So for the next few weeks before, during, and after the Fourth of July, I made it a point to use it at the beginning of every conversation I had. And as it turned out; people were more interested in wieners than I thought. We started discussions about holidays, hotdogs, fireworks, baseball games - you name it! And it was all because of a simple piece of trivia. Another great benefit of trivia is it will positively affect someone's demeanor. Offer some trivia to someone and watch as she raises her eyebrows, nods her head, smiles, alters her body language and leans forward. Trivia expedites the entire communication process! And it's all because your not-so-useless social gift will make people comfortable and more willing to communicate. Satisfying curiosity will almost always produce this result. Social Gift #4: Uplift Them GOOD NEWS: You can be contagious too! Here's how: use fun, laughter, jokes and interesting stories in your daily repertoire of giving social gifts. "But Scott, I can't remember any of them. I hear a joke or a story and then never think about it again." No worries. The best way to organize this content is with a "Laughter Log." I've been using mine for several years as a way to organize my content for books, speeches, articles and learning tools. But it's also perfect for conversations. Simply get a blank notebook or journal and take a few minutes at the end of each day to write down a few notes. Ask yourself this question; then scribble down a few notes about the incident. Do this every day and after a week or certainly after a month or year - you'll have some great material to incorporate into your "first impression lexicon." Laughter Logs reminds me of the first time I met my friend Billy. I was a junior in college at Miami University. He and I were walking down the same path but not speaking, so I decided to break the silence. "Hey man, you wanna hear a great joke?" I asked. After I told him one of my favorite zingers, Billy introduced himself to me, and immediately we felt like we'd known each other for years! We walked further and realized we even knew some of the same students on campus. After we said goodbye and decided to meet up later in the week, Billy said, "Hey thanks again for the joke - I really needed a good laugh." Remember, even if you don't have a lot of time, these four types of social gifts will help you become UNFORGETTABLE! © 2005 All Rights Reserved. Scott Ginsberg is a professional speaker, "The World's Foremost Expert on Nametags" and the author of HELLO my name is Scott and The Power of Approachability. He helps people MAXIMIZE their approachability and become UNFORGETTABLE communicators - one conversation at a time. For more information contact Front Porch Productions at http://www.hellomynameisscott.com.
MORE RESOURCES: July 29 – Holly Area Chamber Networking Breakfast Oakland County Times Networking on Slack Is a New Way to Find a Job, but It Takes Work The Wall Street Journal Networking key to successful job search Continuing Studies Top Enterprise Networking Companies 2022 EnterpriseNetworkingPlanet The Worldwide Time-Sensitive Networking Industry is Expected to Reach $1.8 Billion by 2027 - ResearchAndMarkets.com Business Wire What is an Enterprise Network? EnterpriseNetworkingPlanet 7 Enterprise Networking Challenges EnterpriseNetworkingPlanet What is Software Defined Networking? EnterpriseNetworkingPlanet Outlook on the Time-Sensitive Networking Global Market to 2027 - 5G Time-Sensitive Networking Presents Opportunities Yahoo Finance Waskom Chamber of Commerce hosts networking event Marshall News Messenger First Responders Need Data. Can LTE Networks Come to the Rescue? US Department of Commerce Can SONiC be the Linux of Networking? The Register 5 Tactics for Attending Networking Events Advertising Specialty Institute Reconnecting at in-person networking conferences TheFabricator.com Take a Measured Approach to Software-Defined Networking FedTech Magazine Beyond basketball: Summer League is NBA’s networking summit Las Vegas Review-Journal Juniper Networks Announces Cloud Metro Innovation to Drive Sustainable Business Growth for Service Providers Business Wire LGBTQ+ networking group keeps Pride alive year round Delaware First Media Top 5 Simple Networking Tips for Students StudyinCanada.com! Farm Data Relay System: Combine LoRa And 2.4 Ghz Networks Without WiFi Routers And Cloud Dependence Hackaday Microsoft finds Raspberry Robin worm in hundreds of Windows networks BleepingComputer Key skills to overcome fear of networking The New Times Networking club explores new ways to engage others The Star Online IoT Use Cases in 2022 EnterpriseNetworkingPlanet Anonymous Social Networking Software Market is Going to Boom | Tencent, MOMO, Tantanapp Digital Journal Networking scheme helps minority ethnic nurses to thrive Nursing Times Henderson Chamber of Commerce to Host Networking Breakfast: On a Roll – Local Gaming Update With M Resort Spa Casino Leadership Nevada Business Magazine Significant Trends in Communication and Networking ICs market with Top Key Vendors, Types, End-users and region – Designer Women Designer Women "It's not who you know, it's who knows you." Panel of CEOs emphasizes importance of networking madison365.com Home Networking Device Market is Booming Worldwide with Mechoshade Systems, Schneider Electric, Watt Stopper – Designer Women Designer Women Upload speeds lag in Phoenix during mobile networks tests Arizona's Family Northrop Grumman to build Space Force prototype for cyber protection of satellite networks Breaking Defense EXCLUSIVE NETWORKS: Disclosure of the Total Number of Voting Rights and Shares Forming the Share Capital as at 30 June 2022 Business Wire New Strategic report on Social Networking Tools Market Growth, analysis and Forecast to 2026 – Designer Women Designer Women Ribbon Cutting for Space Development Agency's First Ground Operations and Integration Center in Grand Forks Kevin Cramer Advent One acquires Layer 8 Networks, complements hybrid cloud offering ChannelLife New Zealand Lessons learned from the best run supply chain networks FOOD Magazine - Australia Mexican networks ramp up help for US women seeking abortions The Associated Press - en Español Social Networking Advertising Market Production & Demand by 2031 – Designer Women - Designer Women S'pore, US launch networking programme for women in tech The Straits Times Café Ukraine provides social space, refreshments, networking for newcomers to Ottawa Ottawa Citizen T-Mobile shuts down its 3G networks Land Line Media Regional Sports Networks Plot Streaming Future Without Pay TV Bundle Hollywood Reporter Major TV networks, including Fox News, plan to televise Monday's hearing of the January 6 committee CNN These Essential Networking Finds Boost Digital Equity, School Capacity and Speed EdTech Magazine: Focus on K-12 7 types of networks and their use cases TechTarget 6 types of enterprise networking topologies TechTarget Why Networking Matters More Than Ever Chicago Booth Review Networking online: how to make professional connections remotely and why it matters The Conversation 3 Industrial Networking Trends Automation World Essential networking tips to help you win new opportunities in 2022 The CEO Magazine 5 Top Software-Defined Networking (SDN) Trends Enterprise Storage Forum What's the status of AI in networking? TechTarget Top Computer Networking Jobs & Salaries 2022 | ENP EnterpriseNetworkingPlanet One hour of networking for career success Fast Company Glossary of networking terms Network World Is Networking the New Killer App? InformationWeek |
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